I was wondering if I could create a useless alternative to the Nato Phonetic Alphabet, so I decided to give it a go (with a little help from the internet, friends and a pencil that claims to be 100% wool and has the instructions “DRY CLEAN ONLY” printed on it).
Anyway, here is the Non-Phonetic Alphabet:
A – Aether, Aisle, Auxiliary
B – Bee / Bdellium
C – Czar, Ctenophore
D – Djembe
E – Euro, Eye, Eight, Eiderdown, Euthanasia
F – F-Stop
G – Gnat
H – Honour
I – ???
J – Jalapeño
K – Knee, Knight
L – Llanelli
M – Mnemonic
N – Nguyen
O – Oestrogen, One
P – Pneumatic, Pterodactly, Phlegm
Q – Quiche
R – Rzeznik
S – Sgraffitto
T – Tsunami
U – Uighur, urushiol
V – ???
W – Write, Wrap
X – Xylophone
Y – Yvonne, Yreka, Yttrium
Z – Zaragoza
Use it to annoy people in call centres at your own risk.
My name is Hannah, spelt H for honour, A for aisle, N for Nguyen…
The name is also a palindrome so you should be able to spell the rest by yourself.
If you’ve got better ones, just comment and I’ll add them to the list.
I’ll be really impressed if you find any good ones for F, I, L, N, R, S, U, V, Y and Z.
Yvonne
Thanks! I’ll add it to the list!
Love this post! Reminds me of the classic
“The Irish playwright George Bernard Shaw is said to have joked that the word ‘fish’ could legitimately be spelled ‘ghoti,’ by using the ‘gh’ sound from ‘enough,’ the ‘o’ sound from ‘women’ and the ‘ti’ sound from ‘action.’ ” (this and more at: http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/27/magazine/27FOB-onlanguage-t.html )
o– Oujia, as in Oujia Board
w–Wrestle
M as in Mancy
In Welsh “F” is pronounced like “V” so you could use a Welsh place name that begins with F. Maybe. Can’t think of any right now though. Fishguard doesn’t work.
Velociraptor!! (I stole that, but you can keep it)
Funny to see this creative piece, since I’ve never seen anyone else play with this–aside from myself. I haven’t “published” an example, but I’ve experimented with historical and geographical subjects. Nice job.
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Perhaps “I” as in Ian…
Thanks for following my blog. I like the idea of a new phonetic alphabet, but doubt I could remember it at the right moment – I tend to make it up as I go along, and, as you say, annoying people taking messages!
Brilliant collection. I tried to have a go at the two question marked letters. But drew a blank.